I feel like I’ve been unraveling at the seams for about three weeks now.
My dilemma: I’m not sure if I was always this stressed but oblivious to it, or if this is a whole new level of stress.
For the past year I’ve been feeling great, eating well and sleeping well, and started taking note of my anxiety levels. A few months ago I cut out fructose and that, combined with everything else, really brought me a sense of calm I haven’t felt in maybe forever.
(Though, to be fair, my level of “calm” is relative to my normal mental state, which is always “on”. What I consider calm, some people might consider “still anxious”. That’s okay, I’m a work-in-progress.)
For me, everything ultimately comes down to sleep. If I can’t get enough sleep, I
stress the hell out about it and make everything way worse slowly lose control over my food choices, my skin picking compulsion, my thoughts, my acne, my mood, my digestion, everything. And I’m less able to cope with stress I can’t escape, like helping out my dad with doctor’s appointments and being there for him when he’s stressed out.
So then I loose control of my anxiety, it’s harder for me to catch up on sleep, and the whole thing just goes out the window.
(That’s my anxiety talking. My face still looks better than it ever has since I was a teenager, really. But I don’t have control and it’s freaking me out and I would really like to get eight hours of sleep.)
I’m taking part in a 6-week challenge over at Nerd Fitness. My Main Quest and my focus for the next six weeks is to Calm Down with yoga, guided meditation, sleep and a gratitude journal (cheeeeesy. It better work).
Hopefully I can, because I don’t know what else to do. I need a Stress Intervention.